Like There's No Tomorrow

It was a beautiful, albeit sad, occasion. The funeral home resided in an old mansion in Langhorne, PA probably dating back to the late 1800s. The viewing was well attended by family and friends, many recalling the memories preserved on the numerous photos placed around the large rooms.  The emotions were familiar to anyone who has attended any similar event.  The mixture of smiles, tears, laughter and solemnity were exactly as you would expect in this situation.  There were differences that stood out as well though.

The numerous Flyers jerseys worn by friends matched that of the one being celebrated and mourned. How fitting, to be yourself on the last day the gathered will see your body, and how spectacular to have a bunch of friends that would join in honoring you and one of your passions.  The passions were well noted in the extraordinary number of photos.  They bore witness in the journey from childhood to wedded couple to father. There were scenes from gymnastics in high school, to fishing and hunting in some later years. There were pictures of riding motorcycles and the wedding and vacations with the whole family at the shore.  The memories were not limited to two-dimensional objects though either.  The old 50 something coupe he loved stood watch from the driveway.  Perhaps the obvious needs to be shared as well.

The love of the man, and by the man, was obvious.  There were just a couple people that verbalized what he meant to them, but the teary red eyes were shared by more than a few.  There were the common phrases overheard again and again, along the lines of – “it’s been too long, it’s good too see you, though I’m sorry it’s under such circumstances.”  The sincerity was as heartfelt as the handshakes and hugs that accompanies the words.

The challenge for us all is to admit to that our lives are lived in seasons.  We drift together and apart for so many valid reasons often without intention and certainly without malice.  Jobs change, our addresses change, simply put, times and circumstances change.  It’s a good and beautiful thing to reconnect.  It’s honest and loving to recognize that you miss your old friends, and it’s glorious to know that our love for one another can bring us all back together even if it might just be for a day.

How many of us walk away from these life celebrations and wonder; Have I made a difference in people’s lives in a way that I too may have a group to gather in my memory? If, like me, you’ve asked that question then what comes next? What’s our call to action, what is it that we are going to do that has purpose and meaning?  What might I change, do more of, do better and, maybe as important, not do, to have a lasting impact on my family, friends, community and the world?

Deb was reading aloud a book on retirement on our drive home.  It was rather ironic that the premise of the book is that having a purpose after retirement is at least as important as the funding that you have in place for your retirement. Isn’t that really the same thing as the set of questions above?  The book talks about how people are often stuck in a routine of their job or career and as a result lose sight of who they truly are.  We tend to identify ourselves by our occupation, and it’s one of the first questions asked of someone we meet.  “What do you do for a living?”  After years of working we tend to identify ourselves by our job choice.  “I’m an electrician.”  “I’m a nurse.”   Yet, that’s just one aspect of who we are.  The book dares us to redefine ourselves for retirement.  While I still need to sort what the full answer to that is for me, in part it will be “I’m a wandering explorer, photographer and blogger wanting to highlight and share the beauty around me.”  I want to be best imperfect partner I can be to my wife. I want to be the compassionate and loyal and enjoy a great meal and good conversation with my friends, old and new alike.

My prayer is that what ever season of life you might be in, or are starting, on this day.  Whether it be a day of celebration, a time of grieving or perhaps a mixture of both, let us remember -

to be kind and forgiving,

recognize the wonder of life,

see the beauty in the world and

love like there’s no tomorrow. 

Peace & Love to you all,

Brian